Thursday, 19 February 2009

Ain't Misbehavin'

I WON'T bore you with how excited I am to be dining at Purnell's tomorrow night.
But what I will say is that I promise to behave myself.
See, I've got a bit of a track record of misbehaving in fancy eateries.
Loving the food so much that I forget my surroundings often results in a few distasteful glances from fellow diners.
Like when I used my finger to mop up the last of some divine raspberry sorbet at Loch Fyne in Knowle. That one went down a treat. My better half said the couple on the next table just looked on, aghast.
So in a bid not to be banned from Purnell's - and to protect my loved ones from shame - I shall I obey this code of conduct (all which I am embarrassed to say I have previously broken).
  1. I will not overdose on the bread basket, even though it's 'complimentary'. Five exquisite rolls at The French Laundry and the waiting staff stopped asking if I 'cared for another'.
  2. I won't use my finger to clean out the pat of butter.
  3. I will not over-zealously guzzle my water so that when the ice and water reach the top of the glass it makes a loud and embarrassing noise.
  4. I will only use the cutlery provided to eat my food (no fingers, or chunks of bread French-style).
  5. I won't use the cutlery for any other purpose.
  6. I will only eat my own food and not that of my fellow diners.
  7. I will be mindful that I am about to eat a rich meal and my tummy might swell and will therefore dress appropriately (i.e. not my too-small size 8 dress).
  8. I won't use all the lotions and potions on offer in the restrooms. Other diners want to be able to smell their food, not my Eau De Cologne and Molton Brown hand cream.
  9. I shall only eat the number of petit fours I can manage. It is not imperative to clear the plate.
  10. I will not try and discreetly pinch any souvenirs of my experience. I am still ashamed that The French Laundry's Maitre d' saw me slipping one of their iconic wooden pegs used to hold their napkins into my purse.
Wish me luck?


Claire said...

Nooo! Go for it Emily. Take your tiny tea soon and make sure you taste everything in sight!

Emily said...

Ha! Thanks Claire. Will do. I really plan to enjoy it (even if I do attract a few steely stares!). x

Graze with Me said...

That's hilarious, I do that with the bread too! Keep the rolls coming! To answer your question on my post, I found out what blood type I am by knowing what my parents are. My mom is B and my dad is O. I can't be an O because both of your parents must be O in order for that to happen. If you find out what your parents types are you can probably google it to figure out the dominant type.

Thinspired said...

Haha---this place must be REALLY good!!
Thanks for the asparagus info. I might have to check that out if I get another asparagus craving! :)
Enjoy yourself tomorrow--can't wait for a full report!

Neil said...

Purnells. Lovely, are you going a la carte, or the tasting menu?

The tasting looks to be good value, even when paired with wine.

Take piccies! said...

Good luck, have fun, and I can't wait to hear all about it!!

Carolyn said...

I hope it was fun following the rules. But my latest great advice, and I will happily share it with you, is "What others think of you is none of your business!" So, stick your fingers in the sorbet!

Emily said...

Thank you all for your comments! I am so excited I am wishing the day away! I can't promise I won't binge on bread rolls, I am having a hungry day!
Neil, I am not sure if I will opt for the tasting menu or the a la carte. I am currently tempted by the main course of brill cooked in coconut milk with aubergine puree and thai infused salsify, but who knows what will take my fancy when I get there?
Full report pending...

Heavenly Housewife said...

Oh god, I totally relate to the bread basket thing. I just LOVE good bread and butter. I never pass up the second bread basket, but I always make my husband ask for it (I wouldn't want to appear un ladylike lol).

Emily said...

That is so funny Heavenly Housewife. I always misbehave when it comes to the bread basket.My other half told me that he has no 'stop' button when it comes to chocolate and I have no 'stop' button when it comes to bread!!