Highland Fling (Part One)

ANYONE who has watched the television programme The Vicar of Dibley will have probably seen the regularly repeated Yuletide episode.
It's the one where Dawn French's character is invited to consecutive Christmas lunches at the homes of all of her parishioners - and is too polite to turn any of them down.
Well, that was the running theme for my time in bonny Scotland.
Our feasting began with lunch at Glasgow establishment The Ubiquitous Chip.
Famed for it's passion for Scottish produce since 1971 The Chip, as it's affectionately known, is tucked away on a cobbled street in Glasgow's trendy West End.
It's 'old pub' exterior belies the tranquil botanical garden-style interior. With it's indoor pond, sprawling vegetation and trickling waterfall, you half expected to spot a butterfly or hummingbird flutter past.
But the food they serve is far from bird food and we tucked into a sumptuous three-course lunch, which started, for me, with traditional cock-a-leekie soup. Packed with vegetables, chicken and pearl barley, it was perfect fodder for the rainy day it was. Bread was homemade and warm, with great chunks of salty butter.
Claire, meanwhile opted for the hearty vegetarian haggis, served with mashed potato and turnip cream. She proclaimed it 'delicious', although I didn't just take her word for it, so I tucked in too, and it was.
Her main course choice was Scrabster-landed salmon on vanilla and lime mash with red pepper sauce. This curious combination was a success, and the salmon was flaky and delicate.
I opted for the aubergine and tomato bread and butter pudding with aubergine fritter, tomato vinaigrette and pan-fried mushrooms which was also a generous portion, packed with flavour and expertly cooked.
We shared a dessert of Caledonian oatmeal ice-cream and fruit compote, as our tummies were full and we just craved a sweet taste.
We resolved only to eat light later. More fool us.
Later, after an afternoon shopping, sightseeing and rain-dodging, we were collected for our transfer to Kilmarnock, where our hotel and Brahead Food's cookery school are.
On the way our guide - and managing director of Braehead - whisked us off to an industry food show at Glasgow's SECC exhibition centre.
He said we must try one of the banqueting menus from the celebrated Gleneagles Hotel.
Oh, how we protested.
Fortunately for our waistlines at least, we'd missed the starter course because the following two courses of pork cooked three ways, with potato rosti and apple jelly, and chocolate fondant with vanilla icecream, proved almost a mouthful too many...

• Don't miss tomorrow's blog on Day Two of my Scotland trip, and find out why I left Scotland bonnier than when I went...